


bayern won the treble

by TWS



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Chatlogs, FUCK YOU GUYS I CAN NOW ROAST FREELY WITHOUT FEAR OF KARMA, Fluff and Humor, Group chat, Self-Indulgent, WE WON THE TREBLEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:13:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26084002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TWS/pseuds/TWS
Summary: Thomas Müller changed the group chat name to: bayern won the treble.Marco: oh for fuck's sakeToni: It was coming***the aftermath of bayern's treble win.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 41





	bayern won the treble

**Author's Note:**

> i know the messi drama is on everyone's mind but fuck off we won the treble
> 
> i'm allowed to be cocky karma is suspended for the time being so: *deep breath* FUCK YOU GUYS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH YOU TRY AND THROW OUT EVERY EXCUSE IN THE BOOK IT'S EITHER "BAYERN GOT LUCKY BAYERN HAD LESS GAMES" BUT WE WON THE TREBLE AND YOU CAN SUCK MY ASS *exhales*
> 
> ok. enjoy the fic lmao im letting my full obnoxious bayern fan out full flow, also sorry lyon in the last fic i assumed you weren't getting through OOF
> 
> sentimental elise message is kind of gone it's like midnight but know that i couldn't be happy about the other day, i cried my eyes out and everybody on my team deserves it so so so so much, i just can't i love them so much

_bayern won 8-2 against barcelona and won the bundesliga_

_Thomas Müller changed the group chat name to: bayern won the treble._

**Marco:** oh for fuck's sake

 **Toni:** It was coming

 **Sami:** I wonder what the name would be if Bayern had lost 

**Mesut:** it would probably be 'bayern won the treble in 2013' or something

 **Niklas:** LADS 

**Jerome:** IT'S

 **Thomas:** BAYERN

 **Manu:** AND

 **Leon:** WE

 **Serge:** WNO

 **Joshua:** THE

 **Leroy:** TREBLE

 **Leroy:** I'M COUNTING MYSELF IN THIS I WON THE TREBLE OKAY SHHHHH <3

 **Marco:** i didn't think it was possible for this group chat to become more insufferable but thomas managed it, as per usual

 **Marc-Andre:** Personally I'm all for the name change.

 **Toni:** We're still going to remind you of 8-2 for the rest of your life, ter Stegen

 **Marc-Andre:** Yeah... I know.

 **Toni:** Anyway

 **Toni:** What can I even say

 **Toni:** The second treble

 **Toni:** CONGRATULATIONS guys, if it couldn't be us I'd want it to be you

 **Toni:** Destroying the Culé bastards 8-2 in the process as well?

 ** Toni: ** Thank you, Bayern, very cool!

 **Jerome:** ICHHHHHHHHHH HAB DICH LIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEBBBBB TONIIIIIIIII JUNNNNGEEEEE

 **Toni:** Ich auch, you drink safely my dear

 **Thomas:** HE WILL NOT

 **Thomas:** FC FUCKING HAMMERED UP IN THIS BITCH

 **Toni:** Understandable

 **Toni:** Also Jerome Junge, I'm sorry about your injury but you were still a big part of bringing Bayern to the treble again, so kopf hoch

 **Jerome:** TONI IM MGONOA FUCK MGIN LOSE IT I LOVE YOU

 **Kai:** HERZLICHEN GLÜCKWUNSCH BAYERN!!!!! WAS FÜR EIN TURNIER!!!

 **Kai:** IKONISCH, AUFREGEND, ERSTAUNLICH, UNGLAUBLICH!!!

 **Kai:** except for you goretzka

 **Leon:** I DON'T NEED YOUR PRAISE WHEN I HAVE A TREBLE

**Kai:**

**Joshua:** VIELEN DANK KAI!!!

 **Basti:** WELL

 **Basti:** FUCKING

 **Basti:** DONE

 **Basti:** MY

 **Basti:** BOYS!!!

 **Basti:** I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT, IT'S IN YOUR BLOOD

 **Thomas:** WORDS CAN'T EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU BASTI

 **Basti:** YOU ENJOY YOUR MOMENT AGAIN THOM, BOA, MANU

 **Basti:** ENDING THE SHEIKS IN ONE MOVE, WE LOVE TO SEE IT

 **Marco:** yeah at least psg didn't get their filthy hands on the trophy

 **Marco:** but you guys are also literally never going to shut up about this, so i guess everyone's a loser here

 **Manu:** THE GIANT FUCKING TROPHY IN MY LAP BEGS TO DIFFER

 **Manu:** WHERE'S _YOUR_ TROPHY REUS

 **Manu:** WHERE IS IT

 **Marco:** i hate it here

 **Benni:** Lol

 **Marco:** i KNOW i didn't just read YOU of all people saying 'lol'

 **Benni:** Sorry, let me correct myself

 **Benni:** LMFAOOOO

 **Benni:** Bayern won the treble and Dortmund won jackshit 

**Benni:** Sorry Mats

 **Mats:** it's fine.

 **Benni:** But also not sorry I'm retired so I don't give half a shit anymore, I'm just here to watch Dortmund collapse when Bayern get bigger

 **Marco:** i also presume you're here to watch your former club get clapped by uerdigen and verl

 **Joshua:** there are really levels to this game we've just won the champions league and this is what you two are arguing about

 **Joshua:** hate to see it <3

 **Joshua:** ANYWAY TREBLE TREBLE TREBLE BAYERN BAYERN BAYERN ETC ETC

 **Joshua:** FUCK THEM ALL THEY SAID CITY WOULD EXPLOIT US THEY SAID PSG WOULD EXPLOIT US BUT HERE WE ARE

 **Joshua:** ROBERT LEWANDOWSKI ALPHONSO DAVIES JOSHUA KIMMICH MANUEL NEUER THOMAS MÜLLER LEON GORETZKA SERGE GNABRY JEROME BOATENG KINGSLEY COMAN NIKLAS SÜLE THIAGO ALACANTARA DAVID ALABA BENJAMIN PAVARD PHILIPPE COUTINHO JAVI MARTINEZ LUCAS HERNANDEZ OLIVER BATISTA MEIER JOSHUA ZIRKZEE JAMAL MUSIALA MALIK TILLMAN ETC ETC 

**Thomas:** AND DON'T FORGET THE MADMAN ALVARO ODRIOZOLA

 **Joshua:** OF COURSE WE WOULDN'T HAVE WON IT WITHOUT HIM MOST DECORATED RIGHT BACK IN EUROPE

 **Joshua:** MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN FIPS AND BENJI AND I COMBINED

 **Toni:** You can thank us for that

 **Jerome:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **Jerome:** GUYS I KNOW I WAS INJURED AND YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO BE MAKING TORN ASS JOKES FOR THE REST OF MY LFIE BUT I'M JUST SO IN LOVE

 **Jerome:** I LOVE 1 (ONE) TEAM

 **Thomas:** I LOVE YOU TOO

 **Niklas:** *inhales*

**Niklas:**

**Welche Münchner Fußballmannschaft kennt man auf der ganzen Welt?**   
**Wie heißt dieser Klub, der hierzulande die Rekorde hält?**   
**Wer hat schon gewonnen, was es jemals zu gewinnen gab?**   
**Wer bringt seit Jahrzehnten unsre Bundesliga voll auf Draht?**

**FC Bayern, Stern des Südens, du wirst niemals untergehen,**   
**Weil wir in guten wie in schlechten Zeiten zu einander stehen.**   
**FC Bayern Deutscher Meister ja so heißt er, mein Verein,**   
**Ja so war es und so ist es und so wird es immer sein.**

**Wo wird klar schon angegriffen, wo wird täglich spioniert?**   
**Wo ist Presse, wo ist Rummel, wo wird immer diskutiert?**   
**Wer spielt in jedem Stadion vor ausverkauftem Haus?**   
**Wer hält den großen Druck der Gegner stets aufs Neue aus?**

**FC Bayern, Stern des Südens, du wirst niemals untergehen,**   
**Weil wir in guten wie in schlechten Zeiten zu einander stehen.**   
**FC Bayern Deutscher Meister ja so heißt er, mein Verein,**   
**Ja so war es und so ist es und so wird es immer sein.**

**Ob Bundesliga im Pokal oder Champions League**   
**Ja gibt es denn was schöneres, als einen Bayern Sieg?**   
**Hier ist Leben, hier ist Liebe, hier ist Feuer**   
**Und drum bleibt mein München, Deutschlands bester,**   
**Bis in alle Ewigkeit.**

**FC Bayern, Stern des Südens, du wirst niemals untergehen,**   
**Weil wir in guten wie in schlechten Zeiten zu einander stehen.**   
**FC Bayern Deutscher Meister ja so heißt er, mein Verein,**   
**Ja so war es und so ist es und so wird es immer sein.**

**Marco:** i can't stand this shit

_Marco Reus left bayern won the treble._

_Thomas Müller added Marco Reus to bayern won the treble._

**Leon:** JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NIKKI

 **Serge:** SNIGN IT LOSUNDERjh JUNGE

 **Serge:** TO SHTE SKU

 **Niklas:** WHAT

 **Leon:** SING IT LOUDER JUNGE TO THE SKY

**Niklas:** I'M GOING TO TATTOO THIS ON MY BACK I THINK THERE'S ENOUGH SPACE

**Leon:** SON THERE'D BE ENOUGH SPACE TO TATTOO THE BIBLE ON YOUR BACK

**Leon:** BIG BOY NIKKI COMING ON IN THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE FINAL AFTER INJURY AND PULLING IT OFF I LOVE YOU

**Niklas:** I WOULD'VE BODIED NEYMAR BUT THEY CARDED ME FOR THAT ONE SOFT ASS TACKLE

**Niklas:** WHAT WOULD THEY HAVE DONE IF I REALLY WENT FOR HIM

**Joshua:** JAILTIME

**Toni:** It would've been funny as hell though

**Jonas:** Did anyone feel a bit sorry for Neymar crying after the final?

**Toni:** No

**Marco:** no

**Thomas:** no

**Leon:** no

**Joshua:** no

**Niklas:** No

**Mario Gom:** No

**Basti:** no

**Manu:** No

**Benni:** No

**Lukas:** no

**Mario Got:** no

**Mesut:** no

**Sami:** No

**Per:** no

**Jonas:** Oh, okay then.

**Kai:** i felt kind of sorry for him!!! he was crying so much!!!

**Mario Got:** mbappe is like 10 and he was more composed

**Mesut:** neymar lost the plot frfr 

**Mesut:** why was alaba hugging him like that does alaba even know him

**Sami:** Maybe Alaba has a heart

**Mesut:** you literally just said 'no' to jonas asking if we felt sorry for him

**Sami:** Oop I forgot it was Neymar

**Mario Gom:** Okay it's like, pretty shit that he was crying but

**Mario Gom:** He's won it before anyway, and he was shit so it's on him

**Mario Gom:** I'd have felt more bad if he didn't just become the most annoying person in the world in the second half

**Mario Gom:** And if it wasn't PSG

**Jonas:** I guess, just, it's a little sad you know

**Mario Got:** it's also neymar

**Manu:** DID YOU SEE MY DOUBLE SAVE AGAINST HIM

**Miro:** Yes. EVry good saves, 

**Miro:** Well done . Manuel

**Leon:** KING

**Manu:** HE WASN'T GETTING SHIT PAST ME EVEN IF HE CHANNELED THE SPIRIT OF GERD HIMSELF

**Manu:** ALSO ALSO THE BLOCK ON MBAPPE'S OFFSIDE SHOT

**Manu:** THERE'S A REASON WHY WE PLAY A H I G H L I N E FOLKS

**Manu:** AND THAT REASON IS ME!!!!!!!!

**Thomas:** THE ICONERY

**Benni:** Rio Ferdinand in shambles

**Mesut:** i thought u deserved MOTM honestly 

**Mesut:** coman was shit before he scored

**Mesut:** OMG that reminds me tho literally the funniest thing in the world sam send the screenshot

**Sami: _screenshot:_**

**_[Sami:_ ** _Imagine wanting to replace Ribery and getting Kingsley Coman_

**_Mesut:_ ** _i feel sorry for them lmao this boy has the first touch of a camel_

**_Mats:_ ** _he's abusing thilo though_

**_Mario Got:_ ** _but he's also_ _killing every attack before it reaches the final third lmaooo_

**_Mario Got:_ ** _wait hold on_

**_Marco:_ ** _oh my god_

**_Mesut:_ ** _oh my god..._

**_Sami:_ ** _Did Coman just_

**_Benni:_ ** _He did._ _]_

**Mesut:** still literally cannot believe it was him who won the champions league for you

**Mario Got:** they won because we were roasting him

**Mario Got:** give us the trophy bayern

**Sami:** Might be my last chance to get my hands on some silver...

**Mesut:** ok that one hit sam.

**Thomas:** DO YOU GUYS HAVE TO MAKE EVERYTHING EXISTENTIALLY DEPRESSING WE WON THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE STOP BEING SAD

**Thomas:** ALL OF YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY FOR US EVERYONE IN THIS CHAT

**Toni:** Not everyone, are you forgetting a certain someone

**Bernd:** oh shit yeah

**Jonas:** Oh my goodness

**Jonas:** I totally forgot I'm so sorry but

**Jonas:** Julian, are you okay?

**Julian B:** i'm good!

**Bernd:** not you you fucking idiot

**Bernd:** draxler

**Julian B:** oh my god

_Private chat between_ _Julian Brandt_ _and Leon Goretzka_

**Julian B:** WHY DID I FORGET THE OTHER JULIAN EXISTS I'M THE WORST FRIEND OF ALL TIME

**Leon:** i don't even remember playing against him on the pitch he was INVISIBLE

_bayern won the treble_

**Julian D:** Yeah, I'm okay

**Julian D:** Disappointed of course but we came close

**Jonas:** I still love you anyway, Julian?

**Julian D:** OKAY I'M FUCKING CURED I'M BETTER

**Julian D:** JONAS SAYS HE LOVES ME

**Julian D:** WHO NEEDS A CHAMPIONS LEAGUE WHEN YOU HAVE JONAS' LOVE

**Marc-Andre:** That's the spirit

**Marc-Andre:** And though I know Jonas' love is enough, you can always turn your phone off like I did after THAT night Julian

**Julian D:** Maybe I will

**Julian D:** Not to say Jonas' love didn't heal me but

**Julian D:** It'd give you free rein to make PSG jokes

**Jonas:** Of course

**Marc-Andre:** Take the time you need Julian

**Julian D:** See you lads enjoy the treble win Bayern, congrats

**Leon:** why do i feel bad now 

**Fips:** It happens.

**Fips:** Anyway.

**Fips:** Congratulations, Bayern! I'm very proud of you boys for a great campaign!

 **Leon:** HELP NEVER MIND I DON'T FEEL BAD

 **Leon:** HE PUT EXCLAMATION MARKS

 **Leon:** FIPS PUT EXCLAMATION MARKS

 **Basti:** HOLD THE PHONE

 **Lukas:** HE DIDN'T

 **Leon:** 2 EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!

 **Leon:** ALERT

 **Leon:** FIPS SHOWING EMOTION

 **Fips:** It's what you deserve. :)

 **Per:** HE PUT A FUCKING SMILEY FACE BAYERN WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

 **Fips:** They've made me very happy and they deserve a smiley face.

 **Fips:** :)

 **Fips:** I knew it was coming from day one.

 **Thomas:** YOU WERE TELLING US WE NEEDED TO BE HUMBLE AND ANYTHING COULD HAPPEN ACTING LIKE WE'D GO OUT IN A SHITHOUSE WAY

 **Fips:** It's called jinx protection.

 **Basti:** and mülli you know full well why we need that

 **Thomas:** SAY NO MORE

 **Thomas:** ACTUALLY SAY MORE WE CAN MOVE PAST 2012 WE'VE WON TWO TREBLES THIS DECADE

 **Thomas:** NO MORE OF THIS HANGING OVER US

**Thomas:**

**Basti:** :(

**Thomas:**

**Thomas:**

**Thomas:** IT'S THIS ENERGY NOW

 **Basti:** :))))))))))))))))

 **Marco:** there's always time for flick to suddenly take a huge decline next season

 **Serge:** HGEU D LECINEL MYA LS

 **Leon:** huge decline my ass

 **Serge:** HE'S TJHEN ONLE LY

 **Leon:** he's the one and only

 **Thomas:** HE MASTERMINDED THE WORLD CUP WIN AND HE'LL MASTERMIND US FOR YEARS TO COME

 **Basti:** jinx protection müll

 **Jerome:** HANSI IS IMMUNE

 **Thomas:** AND NOW THERE'S REALLY NO BETTER TIME TO SAY:

 **Thomas:** GO FUCK YOURSELF JOACHIM

 **Jerome:** HELL YEAH

 **Thomas:** I BET EVEN AFTER THIS SEASON THIS DICK SNIFFING BITCH WILL SAY SOMETHING LIKE "THOMAS AND JEROME HAD A GREAT SEASON BUT I HAVEN'T CHANGED MY DECISION"

 **Mats:** i thought i had a good season too :(

 **Benni:** You did

 **Thomas:** YOU DID BUT HE'S CLEARLY NOT GOING TO RECOGNISE IT

 **Mats:** i know,,,, i'm over it

 **Thomas:** 😳 

**Mats:** also i forgot to say congrats bayern

 **Marco:** cOnGrAtS bAyErN!

 **Marco:** shut the fuck up headass don't support them

 **Mats:** man i'm just trying to congratualte my former team, who won a treble the year after i left them and got a coach who actually appreciates their players

 **Leon:** 😳 

**Mats:** i'm truly happy for them

 **Thomas:** 😳😳😳 

**Mats:** YOU GUYS DON'T NEED TO DO THIS EVERY TIME I SAY ANYTHING RELATED TO BAYERN I'M BEING A GOOD SPORT

**Benni: 😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳**

**Mats:** BENNI!!!!!!

 **Joshua:** n e wayz... moving on swiftly... 

**Joshua: quick rundown on bayern this season**

**Marco:** ugh jesus christ

 **Joshua:** first we had our dear coach niko kovac saying this:

**Joshua:**

# You can't go 200 km/h on the Autobahn if your car only goes 100!

 **Joshua:** on whether we could press like liverpool

 **Joshua:** keep in mind pressing is WHAT WON US THIS FUCKING CHAMPIONS LEAGUE

 **Leon:** HERR FLICK KNOWS BEST

 **Fips:** That quote will haunt Kovac for the rest of his life.

 **Joshua:** then kovac had us at 7th place

 **Joshua:** he basically tried to drive thom and jer and javi out and all of us just had fucking had it with him

 **Joshua:** and then there was that delightful game against frankfurt.

 **Jerome:** OK CAN I CLAIM PARTIAL CREDIT I GOT THE RED CARD AND THUS GOT HIM FIRED

 **Joshua:** credz to jeri too

 **Joshua:** THEN THE ICON HANSI COMES IN

 **Joshua:** REASSURED BY JUPP HIMSELF

 **Joshua:** HE FUCKS OVER BVB 4-0

 **Marco:** fuck you

 **Joshua:** HE PROCEEDS TO LOSE ONLY TWO GAMES, WHICH WERE REALLY JUST UNLUCKY BECAUSE WE DIDN'T EVEN GET OUTPLAYED

 **Marco:** you keep telling yourselves that

 **Joshua:** WINS THE BUNDESLIGA AND POKAL, AND WINS ALL OUR HEARTS

 **Marco:** not my heart

 **Joshua:** MORE TROPHIES THAN LOSSES

 **Toni:** Zidane did it first

**Jerome:**

**Leon:** GREATEST COMEBACK STORY SINCE SERGE AND WEST BROM

 **Serge:** SUKX MY LASS TNOY PULLIS

 **Joshua:** ALSO WE GOT MIROSLAV KLOSE AS OUR ASSISTANT COACH

 **Mario Gom:** GOAT energy

 **Miro:** THank. You :)

 **Miro:** Me. And Hansi are ery proud o o of you boys :)

 **Joshua:** :)))

 **Joshua:** ALL IN ALL YOU CAN ALL GO FUCK YOURSELVES

 **Thomas:** JAAAAAA JUNGEEEEE

 **Thomas:** FOR NOW IT'S FREE REAL ESTATE WHEN IT COMES TO BRAGGING RIGHTS

 **Thomas:** TONI HAD HIS TIME FOR THREE YEARS IN A ROW NOW IT'S OURS

 **Toni:** Excuse me you all roasted me to shit when I tried to brag

 **Jerome:** IT'S WHAT YOU DESERVE

 **Thomas:** WE WILL LITERALLY NOT SHUT UP FOR DAYS,

 **Marco:** literlaly i've never had a bigger displeasure than reading these messages and you won't stop fucking posting on insta about it

 **Marco:** just wait bayern bvb are coming for your asses this season we'll humble you so quick

 **Marco:** right mats and julian

 **Marco:** I SAID RIGHT MATS AND JULIAN

 **Mats:** i mean i'm going to get torn apart if i say that

 **Julian B:** i'll say it

 **Julian B:** we'll come for you bayern 

**Thomas:** LMFAOOOO

 **Thomas:** WE WELCOME YOU TO TRY

 **Leroy:** i'm so fucking excited for this shit man let's go let's go let's go

 **Leroy:** i'll get to play in the super cup it's fucking TIMEEEEE and god i hope it goes well next season too

 **Marco:** it won't

 **Thomas:** IT WILL,

 **Thomas:** TAKE IT AWAY NIKLAS:

 **Niklas:** LADS

 **Leon:** IT'S

 **Serge:** BAYREN

 **Jerome:** AND

 **Manu:** WE'RE

 **Joshua:** GOING

 **Thomas:** FOR

 **Miro:** ANOTHER

 **Leroy:** ONE

**Author's Note:**

> goofy as per usual but yknow elise group chat fic


End file.
